You can take the GRITS out of Florida, but you can't take Florida out of the GRITS!

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Fun Moday~ World Domination?


This week, Mommy Wizdom is our hostess with the mostess. She wants to know the following:

Hello, Hola, Bonjour, Guten Tag! Yes, it's true, Irish Coffeehouse passed the torch to me, I am the next host of Fun Mondays! I have thought long and hard...

The topic for Fun Monday for 7/28 is:

If you were ruler for a day/week/month/year (your choice on the time) you would...

ex...make coffee free to all citizens. Or you'd abolish the penny. You may also specify if you're ruler of the world or just your country. Have fun with it; be creative.

If you like to dress up, you may also choose to take pictures of yourself in your "ruler" outfit(s) and post them up with your entry.
After thinking about it, I've decided I do NOT want to rule the world. No, no, no...that just would never work.
I'm thinking maybe my country... The first thing I'd do (and this comes from my daily frustrations, mind you) is reinforce the simple fact that English is the language of my country. No more billboards, store fronts, or anything else in any other language. TV and radio stations? Sure, but no more overrunning my FM dial with anything other than English! No one will be required to be bi-lingual in order to get a job. It's all very simple: You come to this country, learn about this country and assimilate yourself. You don't like it? Go somewhere else!
Now, since I am only going to play ruler for about a month or so...ya know, just to feel it out...I think I may also abolish any use of gas powered engines one day a week. That's right - no driving of any cars, trucks, boats, buses, etc. Exception being emergency services and airliners. One day a week of such quiet! Plan ahead for it and get anything you think you might need the next day if you're too lazy to walk or ride! Think a minute about it. Would it really be so terrible? Thingk of the fuel we'd save!!! Now, those of you who have horses would be able to ride them down the streets on that day...wouldn't it be kind of cool?
Next up... we'd go back to the old way of things and 95% of the stores and businesses would be closed on Sundays. Deal with it!
Cable/satellite would be FREE, as would all internet services.
Because of all we'd be saving by have a "no gas" day and Sundays much slower, I would make the electric rates be cut in half. We need electricity. It's not right we should have to pay out the ass for it. Give a little and get a little...
I would give tax breaks and incentives to anyone who gardens in their yard. That's right! You grow your own tomatoes and zucchini, you get a tax break. The more you grow, the bigger the break, too. Of course, subject to inspection (thus creating jobs!).
And finally, ALL left turn lanes at intersections would be controlled by an arrow light. You can only turn left at an intersection when you have an arrow and that's it! No more creeping out into the middle of the intersection waiting for the light to turn yellow or red before you complete your turn. It would keep the guess work out of it and would help curb people's penchant for running red lights (at least down here!).
I guess that's about it. I think my changes would be big enough and drastic enough without adding anything more to the pot. And who knows, maybe after only one month under my rule, the people of my country might start to actually "get it" and enjoy it!
Or maybe not...
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Don't forget to click on the link above to visit Mommy Wizdom and read all the other FM participants!
Also, check out my Google Earth Challenge #14 (below) and take a guess!!

18 comments:

Faye said...

Huhmm--if I could convince my neighbors to take my excess zucchini(when I learn to spell it) would I be entitled to an even bigger tax break? I don't get too hung up over everyone speaking English, but I would like for anyone in the customer service department of our businesses to be able to speak English clearly enough for me to be able to understand what they were telling me to do. This very frustrating thing did happened to me this weekend--aught-t-t!

Olive said...

Dictator! *s* I agree with Faye the the customer service(s) in this country should be able to communicate with all individuals that require their service.

Sandcastle Momma said...

You've got my full support if you ever want to run the place! I'm loving your ideas! When we lived down there I had a real hard time finding a job because I didn't speak Spanish. I still get mad thinking about that LOL And I think the world would be a better place if we all slowed down on Sundays. Yep - you've got my vote!

SophieMae said...

Hear, hear!!! You had me at SPEAK ENGLISH! 8-]

Robocop said...

And I thought I was the only one who would mandate English Only.

karisma said...

I agree, no matter what country we live in, we should speak the NATIVE language!

Love your tax break idea! I did quite well at my first garden attempt last year! Can't wait for the sun to come out and plant again!

iPost said...

I totally was going to do the store closed on Sundays thing too! But then I remembered all the times I forget milk and bread and changed my mind ;0)

Anonymous said...

A complete rehab of the civil court system to bring an end to the frivolous lawsuits.

lisaschaos said...

Hey I like all your ideas! I have to admit I wasn't thrilled with no motors for a day at first, but it grew on me. All sound great, I'll live in your commune. :)

PS - I got the tb friday I believe, I'll pick it up and move it one either later today or tomorrow. Sorry, the weekend was a mess!

SwampAngel65 said...

No problem, Lisa. Thanks for the help :)

ChrisB said...

You have some interesting ideas that a lot of countries could adopt! In a normal week I only use my car on a couple of days so that's an easy one. Sunday's were always a day for church and families when I was growing up. We have really lost sight of this~ and I'm as guilty, because I shop on some Sundays

swampwitch (swampy) said...

I absolutely love staying at home. I would make a good recluse.
Growing up in the Bible Belt, I do remember that on Sunday, we did NOTHING but go to church (TWICE), eat and do the dishes. That was it.
Absolutely, no laundry was done on Sunday.
Didn't shop. Lived too far out in the country. Even if we had gone to town, nothing would have been open.

BTW, just wanted to let you know, every time I see your name, it gives me a little jolt.

Irish Coffeehouse said...

I'm all about stores being closed on Sunday's. And what's up with stores being open on Thanksgiving and Christmas too? Geeesh!

MommyWizdom said...

You're hired, Swamp Angel - geez, free internet and no motor-run vehicles for one day a week! Those are all very realistic ideas. Nicely done... thanks for participating.

IamwhoIam said...

don'何; tはそれ、スペイン語およびフランス語を話す。 あなたのcanpaignとの健康な幸運、嬉しいIちょうどhaven' tの禁止すべての貧乏人の実際に悪いspellers

Alison said...

I love the wiseguy above this post!! I totally agree with the native language. I will never forget going to DMV to renew my license and the test was written in 10 different languages!! All of our street signs are written in English only...no wonder our streets are so dangerous!!

Anonymous said...

Cute, Penny, real cute...

storyteller said...

Methinks I missed your Fun Monday this week … but I’d definitely vote for your 3rd idea! Life was so much simpler and family connections easier when stores were closed on Sundays!!! I’d also appreciate the ‘gardening’ tax breaks ;--)
Hugs and blessings,